"I've spent 10 years in the ringer—divorce, cancer, and a world shut down. I kept the flame low, but now I’m turning the gas back up. We're rebooting the original Selfie and Jesus Toasters on that same mountain in Walden, Vermont... come join the fun."
The story of how we got here.
A decade of making headlines
The miracle that started it all.
World's Coolest Novelty Christmas Gift
$49.95
With Swappable Inserts
Any face (or logo) on toast. Includes 1 swappable custom insert.
$99.95 $150
Free Shipping
The toaster that created a company is back with the classic miracle on every slice of bread. Reserve yours for Christmas 2026.
"World's Coolest Novelty Christmas Gift"
Turns out, people have a lot of opinions about burnt bread.
"The perfect gift for the person who has everything, including a massive ego."
"I got this for my husband's 40th with his face on it. He didn't know whether to laugh or cry. We've been eating 'him' for breakfast ever since."
"Galen's work is the intersection of high-end CNC engineering and pure, unadulterated Vermont weirdness. It's brilliant."
Transparency is key. 100% of your pre-order money goes directly into a dedicated escrow account used only for purchasing and marketing 1000 toasters.
Since the toaster money is off-limits for bills, I rely on my other art to survive until the toasters are here. If you dig the vibe, buy a shirt.
Shop Galen's Tie-DyeWearable Art for Daily Bread